Ask the Coach
Question: My partners and I are struggling these days with tolerance. How do you know when you’re being too tolerant, or not tolerant enough?
Answer: This is a great question and one that requires further exploration. See some “good and bad” examples below.
Examples of Good “Healthy” Tolerance in a Professional Environment:
- Tad walks into the office wearing earphones, dressed casually. He waves to peers as he passes the water cooler and sits at his desk…
- Sally often asks to leave early or slots her time as “busy” on her remote calendar without cause or reason. She works remotely with flexible hours and always gets her work done, albeit at odd hours during the night and sometimes on weekends …
- Brian is a newer partner at the firm and has been giving a department update at the monthly partner meetings. Dave is a senior partner at the firm, and he is sometimes contradictory to what Brian reports on, urging him to be more specific or offering another perspective on the statistics he is sharing …
Examples of Bad “Toxic” Tolerance in a Professional Environment:
- Tad walks into the office over an hour late looking tired, disheveled, and with a strong body odor. He doesn’t make any contact as he walks over to his desk. If he had an office, he’d shut the door …
- Sally regularly calls in to say she will be late or simply is MIA and unresponsive to e-mails, calls, or other instant messaging among members of the team. When pressed for explanations of her absence and unresponsiveness, she always has excuses – mostly about her personal issues, kids, or health – and her work has been suffering as a result …
- Brian is getting frustrated at monthly partners because a senior partner, Dave, regularly interrupts him and is dismissive, often chiming in with stories that elevate Dave’s ego and distracts from the report Brian is trying to give on the department’s accomplishments …
Do you still need some guidance to help you understand when tolerance should and shouldn’t be applied?
Try this. Do a body scan and ask yourself some questions:
- Is anyone else in the office affected by this seemingly negative or detrimental behavior?
- Has anyone – more than one person – every complained about this before?
- Who is offended? Other staff, clients, visitors to the office?
- Has the reputation of the firm been tarnished as a result of the behavior? Actions and words of all professionals reflect the firm and so this is an important skill to master.
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Lisa Tierney, CLSC, is a certified life strategies coach and a marketing strategist who has empowered professional service providers in the accounting and law professions for over twenty years. She is founder & president of TIERNEY Coaching & Consulting, Inc.